Be Honest: Sam Baker

Hey, I’m Sam Baker a lacrosse player and ex dancer & swimmer. For as long as I can remember I’ve been involved with sports or some sort of extracurricular. At one point I was even doing all three at once. But being the youngest of four girls I was always used to being on the go, it was how my life always was and I assumed it’d how it always be. In the spring of 2020 my life change how many others did. I lost the thing that made me, I also had made the decision to focus solely on lacrosse, so not only had I lost everything that made me me, my life got put on hold. I started to struggle with my mental health. And how many players are, I didn’t seek help I hid it not only from myself but everyone around me.

Fast forward to January of my sophomore year, I started to struggle a lot more I was having multiple breakdowns and anxiety and panic attacks daily. I soon found out I was struggling with anxiety and depression. I sought out help. I’ll be honest seeking the help I needed was not easy. It takes a lot to put yourself out there and be honest with not only yourself but those who care about you. One of my biggest fears when I was hiding my struggles was that when I came out about it and told them they would be disappointed not just in me but the fact that I wasn’t strong enough to handle it. But your mind lies to you. I have had so many arguments with my own mind about wether or not I enjoyed lacrosse still or I just didn’t know who I was without it.

However, with the help from my amazing family and friends and top notch therapist I’ve found myself and I’m happy again and I know with or without sports I am still sam baker, a sister a friend and a really good baker, and no matter what I have people who will always love me and support me through everything.

If I had any advice for others who are struggling with any form of mental health or can’t imagine who they are without their sport it would be, be honest not only with yourself but with those around you. The people you surround yourself with will love you no matter what and always be in your corner cheering you on no matter what it is for. Seek help because we all deserve to beat the stigma and be the healthiest version of yourselves mentally, physically, and emotionally.

My Reflection on Athletic Validation:

Athletic validation. This is what can eat you from the inside til you are sitting in your car after practice wondering how you could be better while not having the strength to drive home from giving it all at practice. The need and want for the validation from a coach is detrimental to a athletes mental state. As a athlete who has struggled with this I know how hard it can be to overcome. Constantly beating yourself up about how you should and could be better. But you have to realize you are doing the best you can. No one is a bigger critic then yourself, and everyone is proud of you and you have to be proud of yourself. Even when it isn’t recognized people notice and people know how hard you are trying to get better. So don’t beat yourself up, take a deep breath and ask yourself if the things you say to yourself would you say them to a teamate? And if not you shouldn’t believe it or speak it to yourself.