Always Be Kind: Diane Hensley

I grew up in Palm Beach, Florida, where kids drive BMW’s to school & have massive parties in their (parents) ocean front mansions. I however lived in a tiny little 2 bedroom 1 bath apartment until I was 15 when my dad told me he couldn’t afford it anymore and we would be homeless in a week. I was already being bullied at school so the fear of what these rich kids would think of me now only grew bigger. I ended up staying with friends from school for the rest of my high school studies. My outlet through it all was cheerleading.

Even though we were poor, my dad still sacrificed enough to pay for my sport (yes, it is a sport) and I loved every minute of it. I was on my school’s squad as well as a competition squad for 8 years. Cheerleading was my everything. I wore my uniform with so much pride. It made me feel strong and accomplished. It gave me an outlet from my home life. Our squad traveled a lot to competitions and were even on ESPN and Florida Sunshine Network. The girls on my squad were nice to me, but one always stood out, Brittany Stage. I remember coming to school with holes in my clothes and even though she was a part of the popular girls, she was always kind to me and treated me with respect and how a human being should be treated. We are still friends to this day. I was constantly picked on in my school. I even started cutting myself to cope with everything.

I ended up pregnant in my senior year and dropped out of school and cheerleading. The guy I was with was abusive. I was 6 months pregnant when he forced an abortion that I still have not gotten over. I think about my daughter every day. I actually lived a double life. No one knew the absolute hell I suffered. So not only did I suffer at school from the constant bullying, but also in my messed up home life. I always used cheerleading as an outlet and loved being recognized for making varsity or winning competitions.

After dropping out of school I no longer was able to cheer. I grew very depressed. I no longer had an escape from my life and in 2007 I tried committing suicide. I was hospitalized and recovered but it was a huge wake up call. I realized I never felt like I knew my worth or my identity. Men told me I was an object. My dad told me I was only as good as the grades I made. My mom wasn’t in the picture. I felt like cheerleading was my identity. I didn’t have that now and I didn’t know who I was anymore. I decided in 2008 to leave Florida.

I moved to Virginia where I knew not one single person, and I enrolled in community college to get my nursing degree. I am now a registered nurse, married to a wonderful man who loves me and knows my worth, and my mom and I finally have that relationship I always yearned for. I purchased a new Mercedes last year and live in a beautiful home that I own. I was told I would never amount to much and I believed that for a long time.

I miss cheerleading everyday, it got me through the most difficult times in my life, but more than anything I am happy that my life is where it is today. Maya Angelou said it best, “People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel.” So to all the girls who bullied me- this ones for you. For all the girls out there who are being bullied- you are not alone. You are valuable and worth more than precious jewels. Your identity isn’t in what sport you play or your GPA, it’s how you treat yourself and others. It takes someone incredibly brave to stand up to a bully. It takes someone even braver to be kind in the midst of unkind people. Always choose to be kind.